Nurturing Your Cup
A Holistic Approach to Self-Care
You may have heard of the saying; you can't pour from an empty cup in the context of doing for others. This popular metaphor suggests that when a person is depleted in any aspect of their well-being, it is challenging to give to others. One could also draw from this statement the importance of taking care of themselves so they can better show up or be able to care for others.
This post is not about exploring the whos, whats, and whys of "pouring" or "doing for others" but inviting you to look at your cup.
How many ounces is your cup?
What's inside of your cup? Is it refreshing or depressing?
How do you know when your cup is full or needs replenishment?
What is your definition of full?
I view "the cup" as your relationship with yourself, your ability to be self-aware, and your ability to care for yourself. Everyone's cup is distinct, and no one size fits all.
While studying Clinical Social Work at Nyack College, we learned the biopsychosocial-spiritual model when working with clients. This framework invites us to examine all parts of the client's well-being to understand the person and their experiences better.
I approach self-care from the same holistic perspective and believe it is essential to living a joyful and whole life. Attending to your spiritual, mental, physical, social, emotional, and financial wellness helps to foster a well-balanced, meaningful journey.
There are plenty of marketing messages about self-care displaying shiny items and activities that are #musthaves for #selfcaresunday. However, it's important to be mindful of your needs and what fuels your mind, body, and spirit. The Self-Care Prescription is a beautifully written book by Robyn L. Gobin, Ph.D., that explores the benefits of each wellness dimension in depth.
As we return to looking at our "cup", I'll leave you with these final questions:
How are you approaching self-care in the various wellness dimensions? (spiritual, mental, physical, social, emotional, financial )
Do you know what you need?
What's one thing you will do to care for yourself today in any of the wellness dimensions?
with care + love,
Tanasia Michelle
Navigating Responsibilities While Prioritizing Self-Care
Time Management Tips for Caregivers
Being a caregiver comes with a host of responsibilities.
Often, it can feel like there is not enough time in the day to complete everything for yourself and your care receiver.
There may have been times when you think..."If only I could have another me to help get things done," or "I will take care of myself after I finish ... [feel free to insert whatever that statement is for you.]
Or maybe you tell yourself that you will take care of your personal care activities tomorrow. And somehow, that day keeps getting pushed back to the end of the list.
As a family caregiver of my 92-year-old grandmother, I use time-blocking to organize my self-care commitments and responsibilities.
Time blocking is a time management strategy in which you break up your day into blocks of time. You can plan to do things in different time slots or nothing at all. I like using my Arrivista Planner, a physical planner, but another person may prefer a digital calendar or app. If you are a visual person, you can color-code your time blocks to define the type of activity or priority level. You are the designer and can establish what works best for you.
When organizing and incorporating personal care into my caregiving duties, I couple time blocking with my It Starts with Me Method. This practice entails three essential actions to help enhance your well-being as a caregiver.
1) It Starts with Me
I aim to schedule the first time block of most days with a personal care activity to energize me and create a sense of inner joy and wholeness.
This energizer will look different for everyone.
You could time block 15 minutes for stillness and meditation, 30 minutes for a walk, or 5 minutes for daydreaming. The idea is to begin the day with something that will boost, invigorate, and empower you.
2) Make Attainable Plans
It's important to remember that you will have a to-do list as long as you are living. Everything won't get done in a day.
Now, let's inhale deeply and exhale the heavy weight off our shoulders.
Ask yourself these questions when determining how you will spend your time blocks.
What do I have to complete that has time constraints or deadlines?
When do I have the most mental strength to handle this activity?
What do I have to complete that will have a positive impact on my care receiver or myself and requires low effort?
What do I need assistance with, and who can I ask for help?
What is the most suitable thing to do with less emotional capacity?
What can I automate?
What high-effort task can I do that will save time later?
These prompts are designed to help create self-awareness and guide you with prioritizing and organizing your responsibilities.
Whether you prefer to organize daily, weekly, or monthly, be realistic and mindful of the external factors that can impact your overall capacity.
3) Be Flexible, Show Yourself Empathy
Plans change, and that's okay. If you need to modify a time block due to an unexpected event, be open to moving things around.
If you notice that you have more energy on Mondays and decide to reorganize and incorporate more high-effort activities on this day, go for it. If your care receiver requires attention first thing in the morning, identify the flow that works for both of you.
Conduct capacity check-ins with yourself. Are you stressing about sticking to a time block plan? How are you speaking to yourself about your current life season? Is it time to establish a care team of family and friends?
Remember that you own this strategy and can adjust it as needed.
The caregiving journey already has its ups and downs, and extending love, flexibility, and kindness to yourself will be essential fuel for the days ahead.
Be Blessed & Happy Time-blocking!!
With Joy & Strength,
Tanasia Michelle